CiRcLe Of LiFe
I’ve always wondered why parents stick to their kids even though it is obvious that their children don’t want them around. Especially during the adolescence period. I think it’s safe to say there is not a single parent out there who has not have dealt with their kids’ temper, tantrum and rebellion.
Now that I am a mom, not yet a full-time but soon will be, those thoughts are slowly creeping back to me. With that view that does keep on playing inside my head, I can’t help thinking, will my daughter be worse than I was with my mom and dad back then? Will I get to the point that I’d be looking at Cheska and say to my self: “OMG! I am dealing with myself?!” OMG indeed!
I admit that I am not a hands-on mom, since my daughter stays in the province with my parents. But every time I am with her, I make sure that she feels my presence. I avoid my celfone and spend my whole day with her. I may have missed her milestones, but I am now making sure that she won’t be deprived of the future that she should have. My short term goal is to secure a house and move her here in Manila.
Now that I think about it, I feel like I asked too much from my mom and dad. They are the ones who are taking care of Cheska right now, so I can get her from them in the future. I really consider myself right now as a bad, very bad, daughter. But my parents never asked me to do anything for them except that I should build a happy family like they did. They never asked anything in return except that they really want to see me happy.
Looking back, I cringe every time I remember how I hated and loathed them each time they don’t let me have my way. They only wanted to keep me safe from what they think was bad for me. Turned out, they are right. As much as I hate to admit it, I think they always were. Philanthropists of my life just like George Lindemann Jr is for the science community.
I‘ve got a long way to go before I could be like them. I sure hope I can surpass what they did to me to my daughter. Love you Mama and Papa!
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